How to show up without feeling self-promotional

I was running a workshop recently on personal branding and leadership visibility. The goal was to help leaders show up with more intention – internally and externally.  And when we started discussing online presence almost immediately, someone said:  “I know I should probably post on LinkedIn… but it feels so self-promotional.”

Heads nodded. And they aren’t alone.  I often hear it from leaders I support  - smart, credible people who have strong perspectives, but who hesitate to share them because they don’t want to come across as “selling themselves” or  “arrogant.” 

And the irony is: the leaders who feel this way are often the ones whose insights would help the most people.

Why leaders often stay quiet

There’s a reason so many smart, capable leaders stay quiet online.  It’s not because they don’t have anything valuable to say.  It’s not because they aren’t doing great work. And it’s not because they don’t care.  It’s because they don’t want to come across as self-promotional. Like they are selling themselves or bragging. 

So, they stay heads-down. They do the work. They hope their results will speak for themselves.

And sometimes, that works. But more often? It means they delay building visibility until it becomes urgent such as when they lose a job, or want to make a change or they suddenly realize nobody outside their immediate circle knows what they’re capable of. A personal brand isn’t something you build in a crisis. It’s something you build before you need it.

The difference between self-promotion and leadership visibility

Here’s a simple distinction:

Self-promotion is:

“Here’s why I’m great.”

Leadership visibility is:

“Here’s something that might help you.”

“Here’s something I’ve learned.”

“Here’s what I’m noticing.”

“Here’s a question worth thinking about.”

The goal isn’t to convince people you’re impressive. The goal is to be useful, authentic, and consistent so people know what you stand for, how you think, and what kind of problems you solve.

If you’re not sure where to start, here are 3 ways to share without “selling yourself”

1) Share what you’re learning

This is the easiest place to begin because it doesn’t require you to position yourself as an expert - it positions you as someone who has thoughtful insights. 

Examples:

• “Something I’ve been thinking about lately…”

• “A lesson I’ve learned the hard way…”

• “A shift I’ve made in how I approach…”

• “I used to believe X. Now I think Y.”

2) Share what you’re noticing

People value pattern recognition. And leaders often have a unique vantage point.

Examples:

• “One pattern I keep seeing…”

• “A mistake I see teams making…”

• “Here’s what’s changed in the last year…”

• “I think we’re overlooking something important…”

3) Share what works (and why)

This is where your experience becomes a gift.

Examples:

• “If you’re dealing with X, here’s what helped us…”

• “Here’s a simple way to approach…”

• “A framework I use when…”

• “Here’s how to make this easier…”

You don’t have to talk about your title, your awards, your wins, or your achievements, you can share your perspective  and  insights that will help others.

“But why would people care what I think?”

There are thousands of posts with generic advice. But your insight is shaped by:

·       your lived experience

·       your judgment

·       what you’ve seen work and not work

·       how you think under pressure

·       what you prioritize and your values

And there’s a good chance you’re underestimating how useful that is.  If you’ve ever read something and thought, “I needed that today,” you’ve experienced this yourself. The writer didn’t know you. They didn’t write for you specifically. But their insight still helped you. Your posts can do the same for someone else.

Why waiting until you “need” visibility is risky

Your reputation and relationships aren’t built in the moment you need them. They’re built over time. When you wait until you’re job searching, you want to shift industries or you’re trying to step into a bigger role, you’re doing it under pressure. And pressure makes it harder to show up with clarity, calm, and confidence.

It also means the only time people hear from you is when you’re transitioning and even if that’s not your intention, it can accidentally come across as transactional.

Building visibility early gives you options later and often creates opportunities you didn’t even know you were looking for.

Visibility is career insurance and opportunity creation

When you show up consistently, you’re building:

• trust

• credibility

• familiarity

• relationships

• and a clear narrative about what you do and what you stand for

That leads to:

• people recommending you without being asked

• opportunities finding you

• stronger networks built on real connection

• confidence that your work is visible beyond your immediate circle

• internal influence and leadership presence

And it’s not just for you. When you share what you know, you also:

·       help people who are behind you

·       validate people who are struggling

·       raise the quality of conversations in your industry

·       give others language for what they’re experiencing

Your visibility benefits more people than you think.

A simple way to start (without overthinking it)

If you’ve been avoiding visibility because it feels self-promotional, try once a week to share one lesson, pattern, framework, or question.  Keep it short. Keep it human. Keep it authentic. 

And if it helps, remember that visibility is a service.  It’s a way of saying:

• “Here’s what I’ve learned.”

• “Here’s what I’m seeing.”

• “Here’s what I think we should pay attention to.”

• “Here’s something that might make this easier.”

The goal isn’t to post constantly. The goal is to be intentional and authentic.   To invest in relationships before you need them and to build trust over time.

That’s not self-promotion. That’s leadership.